Cremation; The Untold Story.

I have always been fascinated by cremation. Yes the idea of having someone burnt and then have their ashes sprinkled into water (like in the movies) or left placed near the house chimney. Recently I have been analysing this issue and amazingly while chatting with a friend (Not the one you know). This friend explained that cremation means getting a body of human and then chopping the pieces and placing them on fire.

“Have you watched the videos on Bukedde TV where angry people burn someone during mob justice?”  The friend tells me.

He further explains that this is typically what cremation about. Someone dies, they are burnt to ashes or someone is burnt alive. We further divulge into cremation and wonder what the whole point is. So it is from this we came up with the demerits and merits of cremation.

This is the friend I am talking about

Advantages,
1. With the increasing inflation and spiralling dollar in the country, we came to realise that cremation saves one the price of a coffin and transport costs from the Uganda Funeral Services.

2. Cremation saves land. Investors in the country have been looking for land to put factories to assemble cheap Chinese goods. We do not have to burry people. We can always save the country and provide more land to investors.

3. Cremation saves on burial costs. Yes. At one of those investment club meetings, one re-known entrepreneur said that Ugandans seem to spend so much on burial ceremonies. So it should be a lesson from him that we can save that money and invest in other things that make people happy.

4. Broken hearts are not so broken. With cremation, the ashes can stay in the house. One can travel with them especially if getting over somebody is hard, then you haven’t lost anything at all.

5. During mob justice where the person is “cremated” one doesn’t need to find relatives of the robber who has probably killed to rob. Its saves time as time waits for no man.

6. Solves polygamy quarrels. If the dead person is a man, the different wives can get ashes and sprinkle or keep them. They don’t need to chop the person into various pieces yet there is fire that can burn him to ashes.

Demerits
1. The firewood or charcoal used to cremate people means that we forests are being depleted. Africa needs the forests.

2. We are wasting firewood and charcoal to burn dead humans yet we can use it to prepare food we can actually eat.

3. According to the Human Rights Commission, it is wrong to cremate someone. Every Human has a right to a humane treatment, so cremation of robbers is wrong.

4. Cremation creates unemployment. If people are cremated, the coffin makers, the Uganda funeral services and people who involved in death business will be put out of business.

5. Cremation is wrong. It’s not in the Bible (I am not sure as I tried to call, tweet and poke the Pope and Rowan Williams but they all couldn’t get back to me)

6. Cremation doesn’t let people move on. If you stay with the ashes, then it’s very hard to find another      person to be happy or share your life with.

7. Cremation as proof of total disrespect. How do you burn a human being? It’s illegal and uncouth.

8. Ash capsules are pretty pricy too. If you are to place them in this capsule, then it may be as pricy as a coffin.

9. Cremation causes air pollution in cases where the person was heavily intoxicated. Yeah, this is true. In-fact I know a story. People who drink, smoke, depend on drugs and eat genetically modified food tend to cause air pollution when cremated. (The research findings on this could not be cited.)

During my discussion with this friend of mine (Who is Owen Wilson), this is all we could come up with. Although there are varying definitions of cremation, I think we have clearly explained a concept that we do not understand at all.